Blueberry pie. It’s gotta be the ultimate dessert of summer, especially during the height of blueberry season. And it’s even better un-baked because the fresh blueberries completely shine through. It essentially tastes like summer on a plate (the flowers and twisty lattices are optional).
This was my mom’s favourite pie. Which leads me to my next bit of news….my mom passed away unexpectedly last week 
I started writing this post awhile ago to share my favourite blueberry pie recipe but I hadn’t finished it yet as my summer has been off to a busy start, especially with my new market. But in my original post I’d been enjoying reminiscing about how my mom loved blueberry pie, our summers together as a family at the cottage while growing up, and the amazing blueberry pies we used to always get at a bakery on the way to our cottage. But with my mom’s recent passing, this post has suddenly turned into a tribute instead.
There’s nothing like losing both of your parents to make you feel so lost and unrooted. I’ve never felt more alone in my entire life, especially while sitting in my parents’ house (aka my childhood home) going through all their belongings. I was expecting them to walk in the door any minute and catch me going through their stuff. The day after my mom’s passing it suddenly dawned on me: I’m officially an orphan now.
But I’m finding solace and comfort in knowing that I was blessed to have my parents as long as I did (some people aren’t so lucky) and I’ve got so many wonderful memories of them to treasure.
I’m still trying to make sense of it all while my brother and I are cleaning and organizing their paperwork, getting the house ready to sell, cancelling everything and planning the funeral—all whilst grieving and trying to cope with her loss. Through this process, I’m also realizing how much my mom had still been grieving my dad (who had passed away 5 years ago). She kept everything of his and nothing had changed in their house since he’s been gone– it was almost like he was still there. I know grieving takes time and everyone moves at a different pace (and I’m sure one never really gets over the loss of a spouse) but I hadn’t realized how bad it was and that my mom may have been more depressed than she’d let on. While doing some reading on grieving (for my own benefit), I learned that my mom may have been experiencing ‘Complicated Grief‘–which is a prolonged and more intense form of grief that also incorporates depression. If you know someone having trouble getting over the loss of a loved one (especially years down the road), do some research on this. There is tons of great info and resources that may help.
Last week, when my mom hadn’t returned my calls for a couple of days and a worried neighbour called me to tell me her newspapers were piling up, I knew something was very wrong. I called a good friend to come over with me and she suggested (thankfully) that I call the police to do a wellness check. …